Statue of Puberty

Would you believe it? I just won a Windows 7 Ultimate DVD Licence with 32 & 64 bit DVD included.

What do you fear most?
Death? Failure? Ghosts? People? Pizzas? Roaches?

Most of us have some or all of the above fears rolled up on each other. We seldom realize the essence of all this though.

What is the purpose of this innate emotion? Everyone has some part of it governing their daily lives. A businessman fears a market collapse, a farmer fears famine, the army fears insider ambush, your mum fears you (or you fear her / your dad fears her).

We recognize the facts around fear being both positive and negative. During this stance we no longer have a problem seeing audacity and fear as one and the same. The problem therefore, lies in our thinking. As so many of us think, fear does not intend to stop us from doing what we should do. Fear also prompts us to act, which is where we could place courage. We often mistake courage to be the opposite of fear. Courage actually is positive fear (the opposite of negative fear). We tend to place courage as fearlessness because we don’t quite have that model of positive fear in our braincells. Hence, till the time we learn to think on the lines of positive fear, we cannot really begin to understand that we can positively enjoy being afraid. Make sense??

On the flip side, Yea enough!! we all know fear don’t we. Some shy away from admitting it, some quite fearlessly proclaim it. What do you think fear is all about?

Fear as it stands, holds two parallels. a) Real Fear, and b) Assumed Fear

The Real variety deals with knowing the consequence(s). You know you lie at the end of that cliff, hanging to your next breath essentially which is held around the tree root that you are dangling on to. The sure option that precides here is a fall = death (unless you’re Krrish or Poopman) OR rescue (self or otherwise). This is a Real Fear.

The Assumed stance comes about when we base our thoughts on probability. And that, with the proclaimed knowledge of being hopeless at Mathematics / Statistics, isn’t really a good idea.
You are standing in front of an audience of over a 100 people. You are to address a presentation/seminar. That funny feeling hits you. Anxiety coupled with darting and differed doses of simulated fear. The cause is unknown.

What do you think these two fear forms pronounce? Well, for starters it doesn’t do much. But looking deeper, we could actually reflect upon ourselves and have defined, the stems for our own living. We take fear as a single form of discomfort and do not think from the other side. Yes quite right, the positive side. Fear is a beautiful exponent of how much we can do. But that hardly comes through to our heads, does it?

There is so much to learn and do on the other side. If we don’t get ourselves to believe in the other aspect of fear, there’s no way to understand it. If we don’t understand fear, there’s no way we can understand our lives (which we seldom realize). Ask yourself the question Is Fear what life is all about?

Think about it…

Funny conversation time yet again … small and notoriously hilarious …

Topic: Pals’ birthday which incidentally falls on 27th of this month

Bird
Dear Pals,
Many Happy Returns of the day ….have a great year ahead.
Warm Regards,

Abhi
It’s on the 27th re … but if it makes u happy

Apoo
Bird, tu item hai! I still dont get it…. why do we say “returns”? What are we returning?
Now that Bird has wished you Pals, throw us a party!

Pals
I am soooo touched by these wishes made in advance…:-)Well thank you all anyways and yeah appu tu idhar ajatereko mast party doonga…:-)

Tak
hey pals,Wish you a happy bday !

Apoo
HA!
Tak, I jes love you man! this is like asking at the end of ramayana, who was ‘Draupadi’. (yses, I know she was mahabharata, but thats the catch!)
Stop studying so much Tak!
Whats the probability we will forget to wish Pals on 27th?
TAK: Thats his Birthday!


Junta on respective floors holding tummy

“I have a shoe bite” essentially puts forth “I’ve bought new shoes and you better have a look”. It’s not quite the best of ways to have it broadcasted, I dare say. But certainly is one of the crude and dismantled ways of frolicking around your new shines.

I always wondered why the damn shoe bites you only on one leg. Its crazy, I’ve always had bites only directed to one of my feet, left or right, ankle or toe, front or back. It’s always just been one. Not that I’m complaining but hell yea, it would be fun to have both legs down with chronic pain (well not that bad).

The question here is, are the shoes (branded and f***** expensive shoes) poorly stitched/made with tasteless lack in symmetry and hence the bite? Or is it just me? I can see a hundred million fingers directed onward now.

Okay, so God (or my folks) had this planned. My feet (or parts of it, picked up conveniently) is non-symmetric. Why God? Why Mum/Dad?

Again … I need sleep … or maybe a band-aid

Picked a nail out of my shoe yesterday and took a few steps ahead to realize that it went right into my goddamn skin. Who put that nail there I pondered. Nobody answered. I walked on.

We stumble upon these nails all the time, some prick, some pack a punch, some ruin your shoe, while a few others just don’t hit you. What do you do when you realize it’s there? You pick them out and keep walking. For someone else to fall on? maybe not!

These hinges mean a rat’s ass in our daily being. They really do. They just don’t mean a thing. So what we’ve done out of ignorance is discount and reward ourselves into falsified justice. Makes sense? I’m sure it doesn’t

Then there comes a bunch of beings who like to take the matter to highest court in their living space and fight for their right (of nonsensical justice?). This nail shouldn’t have been on my path. What just happened to my living space? Who has polluted it so much that I have to bear the brunch? … All this for the nail in the shoe and perhaps the skin.

Which of these categories do we fall under? How do we measure the level of involvement (or ignorance) in the riding scales of these events? Are we standing up to our principles? Or are we standing up to what we think fall in our living circle? Or are we standing up to nothing at all?

How many times have you been given a blind ear? Things just don’t go your way. So how do you handle them? Put your foot down and ask for justice (or take it in your hand)? Or choose to walk a fresh path (perhaps rerun the same path)?

We seldom realize the follies in our journeys in life. We cannot differentiate between our have’s and our be’s. The concentric Circles of Influence and Concern. Fact and Story.

COC
- If only I had a boss who wasn’t such an ass
- I would have been happier with that extra piece of garlic bread

COI
- I can be wiser
- I can be a smart worker

Fact
- Rhea cannot swim
- I flunked my finals

Story
- Rhea thinks her dad hates her coz he threw her in the baby pool.
- My dad’s gonna kill me

For all the men and women in the building …

• GROW UP and smell the air around you. Life ain’t that hard. You define most of it. If you choose to live a life which is governed by misfalls and misdoings, then that’s how it will end up being.
• Once again, GROW UP and smell the air around you. If you choose to get worked up over a nail that bites you, the crazy wagon will keep running into you with a tossed bunker every single step of your life (increases exponentially with your level of involvement). Know that you are just not getting it right.
• I wish not to repeat this again, but seriously GROW UP. Know your fact from your story. We package everything and mess ourselves up with the wraps. We’ve never grown out of a story we’ve made on people, things and almost all the time, our own meager selves. Grow out of your Story and work at gaining and comprehending Reality and what-is.

We’re openly blinded to the undivided picture of life. Get a grip ladies & gentlemen …

… Keep walking

Apoo (low voice)

I almost gave up hope. There were so many times I questioned myself. I’ve made so many sacrifices but it’s all been worth it.

(beat)

There are millions and millions of mediocre people in the world Abhi. Isn’t it great that we aren’t one of them?
Abhi looks like he stopped breathing as he backs up in the store. Customers step between him and Apoo. Apoo becomes obscured and then blocked from view.

Out on the Street

Abhi emerges from the store slowly. He braces himself against a parked car and then keeps on walking in a nightmarish daze.
Camera pulls back as he blends in with dozens and dozens of ordinary people, walking on an ordinary street, in an ordinary city.

Fade to black ………………………

Night M. Shyamalan made the stunning movie Sixth Sense and followed it up with another stunner (not many felt so though), Unbreakable. Unbreakable made its mark with a remarkable script. A script which was incredibly linear yet had unrivaled depth.

Unbreakable was about opposites. It was about the strongest and the weakest, black and white, yin and yang. The story brought out the simple fact about nature; the fact that it deals with opposites in just the same way as we inexplicably do so whilst comparing individuals, objects, art, work, skill and sometimes immeasurable entities. Yea, don’t deny it, we compare everything. Shyamalan took that simple fact and extended it to a unified basis (put them on either side of a two point scale balance) that everything exists in duality. Built a story around it. Put a weak man (a very weak man) and a strong man (a very strong man) and made a Miranda on a superhero/rapscallion.

Coming to the point of why this story comes on my blog years after the movie came out is the real question, isn’t it?

Well yea, the characters in the script-skit on top had Apoo playing Samuel L. Jackson’s character Elijah and me playing Bruce Willis’ character David Dunne. Although there’s no real way to measure opposites, some think we come pretty close to Elijah and David.

Scene: Paro, Alap and Abhi are sitting in the car parked next to the pavement opposite Sony Mony, Irla. Paro’s in the driving seat, Alap at the back and Abhi in the front next to Paro. Alap and Paro are lighting their cigarettes. Abhi’s window is up (closed).

Two brown English Cockers are walking by with their master on the pavement towards the car. One of the two dogs spots Abhi through the front windshield. The long droopy ears go up and the tail begins to wag. The dog starts to drag the master toward the car. It comes close the door and starts pawing at the door. Abhi pulls down the window. Dog’s still pawing. Abhi opens the door. Dog struggles to climb up (note: this breed has a low torso, like a Daschund), but tries all its might and comes and rests its long chin and two fore legs on Abhi’s lap. Dog then looks up at him with tilted face. Alap, Paro and Abhi all go gurly with “awee”. Alap cries out to Paro, “quick, take a snap”, but dog master pulls doggie away.

This incident’s just one of the very many incidents with dogs that I have come across in my life. They just go gaga over me for some reason. Every time I come home late from office (or from drink sessions or usually both), I get escorted by the street ruffian doggies, who otherwise thwart anybody and everybody under the sun (especially so if you’re a bhaiya and you drive a rickshaw). They jog and dance alongside me and accompany me all the way to our building main gate from the society entrance (sometimes right up to our wing entrance), and then just walk back to run after hapless bhaiyas. There have been instances with ferocious bloodthirsty canines rippling up around me and sobering down their teeth and claws to sit meekly by my feet. My visit to the US also had firang doggies skip a breath when they’d sniff/spot me. They’d run up to me and start drooling over visible skin portions. It’s just incredibly amazing to experience something in this super affection scale.

I won’t go into stories that describe Apoo’s misfalls on the other side of this scale balance, (we all know about them already). Is it fair to say that Apoo and me fall in this amassing scale of opposites?

If yes then Apoo, here’s a note for you. You don’t have to search for the opposite side of You and in the very process, destroy a lot of innocent beagles by fending them off to the hungriest of canines. Don’t do that, you know where I stay (bang opposite your door man).

PS: I also need your comic book collection (or wait, did I dhaap them already?)

Picked up from a board … hilarious to the core …

Yea i’m looking for Sex,

Everybody who has a dog calls him “Rover” or “Boy.” I call mine “Sex”.

Now, Sex has been very embarrassing to me. When I went to City Hall to renew his license, I told the clerk I would like to have a license for Sex.

He said, “I’d like to have one too.”

Then I said, “But this is a dog.”

He said, “I don’t care what she looks like.”

Then I said, “You don’t understand. I’ve had Sex since I was nine years old.”

He said, “You must have been quite a kid!”

When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with me. I told the motel clerk that I wanted a room for my wife and me, and a special room for Sex. He said that every room in the place was for sex.

I said, “You don’t understand, Sex keeps me awake at night.”

The clerk said, “Me too.”

One day I entered Sex in a contest but before the competition began, the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was just standing there looking around. I told him I had planned to have Sex in the contest. He told me that I should have sold tickets.

“But you don’t understand,” I said. “I had hoped to have Sex on TV.” He called me a show-off.

When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight for custody of the dog. I said, “Your Honor, I had Sex before I was married.”

The judge said, “Me too.”

Then I told him that after I was married, Sex left me. He said, “Me too.”

Last night, Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking around town for him. A cop came over to me and asked, “What are you doing in this alley at 4 o’clock in the morning?”

I said, “I’m looking for Sex.”

My case comes up Friday.

There is never a dearth of overly enthusiastic hyperactive souls in and around our lives. We all have one or two in our offices, schools, colleges, (in Apoo’s case, his Gym and a lot of other places too I’m sure). We seldom have problems with these people. They bring out elements of fun and godly energy in all their endeavors (fruitful or not) and that reflects upon the people they’re with. We’re a happy bunch with these people (well almost always anyways).

And then again there has to be a flip side to this behavior coin with these other few, who despite being as hyperactive as the ones I mentioned above go way beyond the qualms of stupefying their behavior to undefined extremities.

Yes let’s talk about a few of these kinds today!!

The kind I’m referring-to, are distinctively disliked (not hated, but disliked) by all known humans (including their own kind). They have this knack of worrying for all the wrong reasons and what’s more, they charge and enforce the same upon the innocent few around them. The basis which govern their behavior could be as trivial as spotting a small black ant or a house-fly strolling on or around their desks. For all the money’s worth they will, through their divine derivations conclude that the world will end in approximately 21 hours. Yess believe it!! I know one such being (well thank god its just one).

This dude, lets call him X, is the epitome of blemish skits world over. He is directly affected by everything under the sun. Trust me on this when I say EVERYTHING, I most certainly mean it. X’s path is crossed by a black cat and he will worry for himself and the cat. He will march thru’ the history behind the cat’s birth, trace back to its fore-parents and draw conclusions with Darwinian evolution as to why their ecology permits this paraplegic calamity in the making (that of the cat crossing his path on that day). X is also amazingly skilled at making the other person believe that he/she (the person speaking with him) is severely flawed in all aspects of life and the best option for him/her and the living world is simply to not be in the living world. And he/she will select the best possible method to end his/her hideous lives. The stronger souls choose not to speak with him and only communicate thru’ a neutral medium (I usually play that part, although thankfully back home there’s my dear friend who’s burdened with that task right now, but is doing so fantastically well). A mighty lot have fallen into his trap already and its only time till they snap into suspended animation and ask the almighty for forgiveness. Life as a neutral isn’t as easy either. The pompous idiot will drain your living breathe even after a 5 minute conversation (usually it stands at five minutes of sustained brain drainer with 10 repeat sessions of the exact same demeanor crossing over your sad lives). This, is what X can do to you!!

On a milder count but surely a parallel to X, sometime last week, Rajesh told me about this lady (his old college mate’s wife) who came over to the city (in her first visit to the country). In this short period of 7 days, Rajesh, poor fella, had his terror/tormentor slider move way beyond the permitted scale calibration. So much for being a nice guy he says. Last night (or early morning today), at about 4 AM he gets a call from lady tormentor. If I could rephrase that, he gets a hell-raising, knuckle-binding shout from the other side of what was previously called his cell phone (now a disgruntled traitor, he calls it, that he threw off cursing his luck, breaking it into 5 non-fixable pieces of junk. He apparently also sprained his arm and neck in the effort). And what was this hullabaloo all about? Well lady tormentor was stuck in the Laundromat (at freaking 4 AM). First up, WTF was she doing there at that FOUR FREAKIN AM? Anyways, her reason for calling in was not cause she was stuck, but she wanted to know why she was stuck. And whether her usage of water and detergent made the locking of the doors eminent. She apparently called the Bell staff in the hotel asking them the same and got nozzled responses (what would you expect at 4 AM) Now to think that, is fine, but to make frantic calls to Rajesh and not asking for help but demanding for reasons behind the locking up and that too at 4 AM is … ahummm … Crazeeeeee?? Lady, its that time of the year again when check your marbles … yes … its about time sweetie… and for heavens sake … do your clothes at an earthly hour. And leave my good friend alone, he’s my only source to good bars around the city. And I don’t want him psyched out before I leave.

Apparently the rest of last week wasn’t too good either, with lady tormentor suggesting that Rajesh’s hair ought to be more superfluous than it currently was. This happened after 3 days of reconfirming with Rajesh of whether the phone service she just bought had free incoming and outgoing during weekends. She still calls him to confirm the same I’m told (he transferred his line to a new phone piece, he curses himself for doing that now). The name of the package BTW was Free Weekends.

Well anyways … coming back to X, news is he’s on a rampage back home coz the rains stopped without telling him why. He’s blaming his wife for the fact that his kids nails are growing faster than what he claims is the normal rate. I hope she’s a neutral (Neutrals are BTW the most patient of people on planet earth. You could also call them crazy, blind, deaf, dumb etc. as in my case)

Uncut news: Some unconfirmed reports are that he’s going around the city stopping vehicles on the road asking them for their PUC papers.

Watch out fellas. X might just break your day!!

“dropped by to say hello”, they said
I couldn’t take it anymore. I blasted out and asked them to leave at once
“don’t need this. there’s been a lot of wrongs done already”

Something told me, “this was invented”

The Geodon dosage was taking due effect.

Pleaded with the medics, “please, help my ailing head!”

It was hot,

He tried to bend and pull, it wouldn’t let him,

He removed his trousers, and it felt a lot better…

Then he removed the jocks’ too, and woah was that something, they could breathe again!!

The jocks’ were punishing these two this day, he thought

He soared forward to take that leak